11:43AM… I have just posted everything that I had down on these pages and now it is all uploaded to the web-page and I feel good about being able to get it all up there and I am going to make it a daily thing , so I need to put it in my organiser/planner book. Oh I feel so damn good right now that its hard to explain, yes I am in a manic mood so I am on the very up swing of my bipolar and I wont go to far past normal to down as long as I keep taking my medication I shouldn’t get too much depressed about my life. I know its hard to explain but I don’t mind my manic stages because I feel good its the downward spiral that is the death of me, but I always take my tablets so I stay at a reasonably okay down rather than all the freaking way down. People don’t get how I know when I am on the up swing, but I do and here is why: I am typing so fast that I am making lots of mistakes. My thought processes are going all over the place at a million miles an hour and they are all good and positive thoughts and I wish I could get up and run a million miles but I cant even run a block because my back is so damn sore and my feet are swollen like footballs, so I cant do it even if I wanted and that sucks. I keep trying to think of things that I can do and thinking that the time is much later than it really is and I want to reorganise every damn thing, clean and write and read and just be full on al the damn time. I am tying so damn fast and that really is not a damn thing for me because fast always brings mistakes for me. So that is all why I know that I am on an upward Manic state and it feels good and I want to stay this way forever. Hopefully I can connect to the internet tomorrow morning so that I can upload my blog and my feelings from here.


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